What is vacation even

I've been dabbling at commissions and having a bit of fun doing it, but I'm a bit depressed, so it doesn't give me as much joy as it should. I wonder why I always seem to have RL issues whenever I open my commissions? Maybe I should just never open my commissions again, haha

Summer has been hell, but my parents try to cheer me up by going on long walks with me through forests and all. But nothing does it for me at the moment. I have no horses to take care of, haven't ridden in what, a month and a half, and I'm being used right and left. Everytime I try to organize anything at all, my cousin gets in and screws it all up. I don't know how, she must have some sort of party pooper talent. For example - I've been trying to set up a photographic meeting with horses in the nearby forest, but she's picky about everyone trying to join. And after that, she's not picky enough. Two people asked wether they could just come with their dogs to get photo's, but I already told my cousin no. Dogs are, next to horses, a lot of work. We don't even have a sufficient amount of photogaphers ready to participate because they're being picky little shits and all want to photograph at sundown because it's the new fad.

My cousin boldly told the dog owners they could come, then tagged me with a questionmark. What is this, good cop, bad cop? She knows that if I say no now I'll be coming off as the ultimate bitch. I did tell them no though. I don't give a damn. I'm not a ragdoll, and I'm not a maid. If you want to use someone, don't do it to me. I've got enough trouble this summer as is.

To finish off that pretty little picture, I "shared" this stupid little contest thing about a tack set for shetlanders. If you don't try, you can't win, right? It's just a stupid internet raffle. 
She knows I haven't had acces to horses for ages, and am not going to be soon, might even have to fucking stop it alltogether (though I probably won't finish my senior year because I'll be hilariously depressed) and she answers with this - "Hahaha, what are you planning to do?" and when I say I'm going to the nearby barn to spend some time or at least see a horse, she responds with "But why come?", "I mean, you can't do anything there."

Way to go love, why don't you get some pure alcohol, some salt, and rub it all over that wound. Why don't you.

Basically, this sucks, I've got no horses, my photographic meeting is going to hell, and my blood pressure steadily rises while I'm at home, boring myself to death in front of my comp.

To the people that actually read this - you're a surviver. You rock.

Skye